Please don't leave me!

Tuesday, Nov. 19, 2002

So last night we had a roomie meeting. Talked about all the things we hate about eachother and how we can fix it. And Roomie brought up something about the fact that someone told her that the reason I don't have a boyfriend is becasue I supposedly push the physical side of a relationship. Those of you who know me will be shocked at this. For those of you who don't, it took me two week to feel comfortable holding hands with a guy and we were only acting. It made me feel dirty and like a whore and then I asked October about it and he said "Courtney, you were nervous about holding my hand in front of your parents. You're not a whore." So now I just feel like a reject. Oh well. But after our roomie meeing, Roomie asked me if I wanted to go with her and Morman Boy and one of their couple friends to go out to the sand dunes to watch a meteor shower at 200 but my idea of fun as a single girl is not to go out to the dunes with two couples. So I called October.

Princess and Suite 2 and Jamers and I watched "From Hell" Ooo Johnny Depp with a british accent. And October came up like twenty minutes into the movie and said that he wanted to go with me and Jamers asked if she could come. So we finished the movie at like 130 and left for the dunes, telling Roomie, Morman BOy and Random Couple 2 that we would meet them at the parking lot for the dunes at a little after 200. They never showed up. So Jamers and October and I went out on our own. There were tons of people there, so the tree of us found a secluded little valley and lay down to watch. It was the most amazing thing in the world. It was beautiful! The meteors were incredible. Small white dots shooting across the sky with purple tails. It was so incredible I can't even begin to explain it.

I've come to a point where I don't like October anymore but he's still my friend and I love him to death. I just had to recognize that nothing is going to happen. But I still wonder what that Wednesday meant. . .

We got back at about 430 I crashed and woke up about two hours ago. I have homework for Soc. tonight but can't do it until Suite 2 is at class. Fun fun fun!

Ohhhh last night ::Ahem:: Rocked?! I crack myself up!

Wipe the sleep out of my eyes stopped here at 1:14 p.m.

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