mind the gap

Please don't leave me!

Hearing: "I can't make you love me"; The Kimberley Locke Version
Wearing: "The 'V' Spot"; Sherrie Krantz
Feeling like: I'll close my eyes then I won't see the love you don't feel when you're holding me

Wednesday, Sept. 01, 2004

Yes, it's been a week, a full seven days, but I'm trying I swear! I really don't want to put in how everything is but I will. Will and I took a random road trip to Saliada to get Taco Bell Sunday night. On the way back he starts talking about how he feels like we already act like boyfriend/girlfriend. Then he basically dumped me, how talented do you have to be to get dumped three times in one year and never have a boyfriend. I know! Now, who wants to touch me? I said who wants to f***ing touch me?!?!? Ah, God bless Cartman!! Anyhow, it's a little weird because we have all these plans that we've made and I don't want to break them, I don't know about him I think I'll ask him tonight, but I feel like we're always talking to eachother about how we feel and I'm always crying my eyes out. But what else is new? I actually had the balls to go see a counsleor today (mostly because I put three huge gashes in my left arm this weekend) and after we talked I felt a lot better. Do I love him? Yes. Would I do anything in the world for him? Yes. Do I still want to jump him even though I'm not supposed to? Hell yes! But more than that do I just wnat him to hold me like he used to? Yup. What a sap, look at me!

Nieve and Sara have been so wonderful though all this. Never treating me like a freak or anything, just being there and loving me. I don't know how I ever lived without those girls and hope I never have to again! Honestly they let me ccrash on the couch whenever I don't feel like going home, they feed me, clothe me when needed. It's just like family. Honestly we have so much fun together. We're going to Chicago this weekend for Mondo's birthday. I'm so stoked, really! We leave to go home on Thursday night and our flight leaves on Friday morning. Can't wait! it shal be Vunderbar!!!!

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mind the gap